My playground memories consist of detailed games of Mummies and Daddies – I was never good at playing the baby, so I would be the loving mummy tearing her hair out whilst chasing after her cheeky toddler.
It wasn’t just that I had a vivid imagination (teachers always said I was off in ‘Chloe Land’): I didn’t really like other playground games. Running after kids who were faster than me, stronger than me, taller than me…I hated it with a passion. My idea of fun was envisioning what I wanted my future to be and recreating it with my friends.
Fast forward to now.
I am almost 19 and starting my second year at university, studying a subject I adore.
I am proud to be a woman and stand by the importance for the expression of the female voice.
I am also the second eldest of 10 siblings. Yes, you read that right.
I won’t delve into the misconceptions surrounding large families – some comments are pretty disgusting.
All I will say is that I have grown up in an environment dominated by love, laughter and newborn babies.
It’s messy and stressful and tiring (I’m under no illusions!) Nonetheless, I would describe it as a beautiful sort of chaos.
One which has permanently stimulated my maternal instincts from the moment I first felt a baby in my arms. I look into those bright blue eyes, bundled in baby pink or baby blue and say to myself ‘I want one’.
I want to be a mother. I want to cook and bake with my family. I want to get married and care for my husband (and him for me). Deep down, I know I want to be a housewife. And I am not any less of a feminist because of that.
It’s not that I’ve been encouraged to only seek this traditional role. If anything, I’ve been taught to aim high! To do whatever I put my mind to.
But I don’t care about money or success. I have so much love in my heart that needs somewhere, and someone, to go to. I care unconditionally.
I respect that my dream would be considered an absolute nightmare to others. Nobody should feel pressured into being a stay-at-home mum, just as nobody should feel pressured into being a mum at all! Break through the glass ceiling, ladies!
But, despite only being at the cusp of young adulthood, I know I am ready be a mum. Emotionally, I’ve been ready for years. It’s the physical barriers, the practical barriers, that have been holding me back. Money, a career, a home, a partner…
I don’t see having a baby as throwing my life away, I see it as the way my life is meant to be.
Everybody has a purpose in life: what if, for some people, that purpose is to be a mum?
Do I hate the idea of performing the expressive housewife role? No. No I do not.
Whenever I do finally become a mother, why would I want to dash back to the world of work rather than spend every precious moment for the baby I have dreamt endlessly for?
It’s not for everyone. But I know it’s for me.
No woman should feel pressured into the child-centric ideals pushed by society.
But you are no less a strong, independent woman for craving the role feminists want you to reject
Photo courtesy of Lea Böhm