Blurred Memories

There was once a monster that consumed her.

It moulded her brain into something it was not meant to be. It grabbed a hold of her, shook her, brought her to her knees, dragging her down so harshly that she could not breathe. I saw her slipping through my fingers, disappearing. This was not her face. She was no longer laughing. She lost her smile.

They put a helmet on her head. They decorated it in stars and butterflies. All the things little girls love. They put a pretty helmet on her head, to stop her from smashing it into the wall. They recorded. They counted. They watched as this little girl lost control of her body, arms flying outwards, eyes all confused and searching for why.

They gave her medicine. They gave her another. Then another. But no matter how much it tasted like sweet sweet toffee, it would not stop the monster who kept crawling out from under the bed. Everyday it was 3, 4, 5,. Thought it would slow but it speed up to 100. Part of my routine was the counting. For scientific purposes we had to count my sister’s illness. Nothing can ever break me as hard as seeing my sister lose herself multiple times a day. A boy can never break my heart. And seeing your mother breaking because her child might not make it. Your brother going in on himself. My dad never saying how he truly feels. I wanted to wrap my arms around my family to stop then falling apart. I hoped it would be enough.

Hi, so this piece of writing is inspired by my little sister. I have had in the note section on my phone for ages and I haven’t really shared it with anyone because it felt very personal. When my sister was younger, about 2/3 she had very bad epileptic seizures. I was nine and ten years old at the time, and it was a very tough time for my family as we didn’t know if we would ever come out it. Luckily one of the medicines really worked for her and her seizures stopped, and now she’s twelve and living her best life. She’s very creative, she has her own youtube channel (s), loves her football and has great ambitions. We as a family are very close I think because of the experience, I know this piece is quite sad but we’re out of that part of our lives now, and are much happier. I hope you guys enjoyed it!

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