Sexual Expression

Every time I go on a night out, I fall in love with the strength of my friends all over again.

I see them strut into the pub looking stunning

In tight fitting dresses

In crop tops and mini skirts

Embracing every single curve of their body

Every single freckle

Every single line

Making the entire pub stop

Unable to ignore the power that has suddenly entered the room.

We laugh, drink and have a good time

But then the best moment comes.

A smile appears on their face.

A glint in their eyes.

They ask me to hold their drink for a moment.

Without hesitation, they go over to the person they spotted on the other side of the room.

The light touches

The gentle laughs

The excitement of what could possibly be

They embrace it all.

Sometimes I won’t see them again for the rest of the night

And I think good on them.

Other times they come back and say they got bored

The person was an asshole

The person wasn’t assertive enough for them

And I love that.

To see the power and control they have in their bodies

And their expression of sexuality.

To know exactly what they want

And follow through on it.

I thought there was something wrong with me

Because I wasn’t having casual sex

And I wasn’t confident in the crop tops.

I thought I wasn’t sex positive

Because I wasn’t having sex with anyone

But then I learnt

From my friends in the bars;

Sex positivity does not come from forcing yourself into sex

But within power and control

Finding what you like and dislike

And embracing it.

So, when I walk into the pub in my long-sleeved dresses and jeans

I feel on fire

Because I decide who gets the privilege of seeing my body

And who does not.

When a guy attempts to hit on me

I tell them not to bother

Unless they are prepared to take me out to dinner tomorrow night.

They can have the biggest dick in the world

But if their personality is cardboard I’m not interested.

I can still believe in sex as an expression of intimacy and love

To be close to a partner

While cheering my friends on to get that guy on the other side of the bar

Sex can be the top of a mountain I haven’t climbed yet

The views will be beautiful when I get there

But it’s ok if I’m not there yet

Sex positivity means embracing your sexual expression

No matter what form it takes.

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