Coming out for me was a mixed experience. It was mostly positive, my friends from both uni and from home were very supportive, my mum received the new okay when I eventually told her and most of my family were pleased when I announced I had a girlfriend via a Facebook status nine months after my relationship began.
However, my dad didn’t take the news about me having a girlfriend very well initially. I was anticipating a negative reaction from him, but part of me was slightly hopeful that I wouldn’t experience it. But those hopes were quickly destroyed.
For the last two weeks of the Easter break I got the silent treatment which made me feel extremely uncomfortable in my own house. Many tears were shed on my part and I had moments of doubt, questioning what I wanted and what was the right thing to do. I just felt so worried about the bond between me and my dad potentially being broken forever but I also was so happy in my relationship that I didn’t want that to end either.
Once I had returned to uni, however, and my dad no longer had to see to my face and had time to think, things got easier. We started to text more and went back to having the jokey, banter we usually had. Nothing was really discussed about my sexuality or my girlfriend but I just knew that my dad had now come around to the idea and the immediate shock was no longer a big deal anymore.
Now my dad is completely fine with my relationship and although I do still feel a bit awkward when talking about it with him I know that it doesn’t bother him anymore.
Overall my coming out experience has been mostly positive (which I am incredibly thankful for) and even though my dad didn’t take things too well to begin with, over time he has gradually become more comfortable with it all. The few weeks of feeling unaccepted felt like they would last forever, but eventually they did come to an end.
I am still working on completely accepting my own sexuality, but I’m sure that will come with time. I have spent many years feeling anxious, hating and wanting to hide this part of myself but I am slowly on the path to embracing my bisexuality. I having been dating my beautiful girlfriend for over a year now and I am the happiest I have ever been in my life.
Photo by Steve Johnson